Jammin' Adoption Fundraiser!!!!

Have you heard of Jamberry????? I only heard of them recently, and am excited to get to try them out soon!!!!!

"Jamberry Nails are the NEWEST way to accessorize your fingers & toes! Lasting up to 2 weeks on fingers & 5-7 weeks on toes. These non toxic, vinyl based nail shields won't chip, peel OR fade! Heat them with a hair dryer & apply them to your nails! Over 300+ designs to choose from including Jamberry JUNIORS, French tips, solids, sparkles & designs galore! Your nails have never looked so good!" (description from Pinterest)

We are having a Jamberry party as a fundraiser to help with some of Layla's adoption expenses!!! My fellow adoptive mama friend, Brandy, has volunteered to do this for us and I am super excited!!!!

My party starts TOMORROW (Monday, February 16) and will run through Saturday (February 21).

If you want a FREE sample to try, just pick a number from the photo below and either leave a comment on FB with your number OR message me the number you want. I'll also need an address to give Brandy and she will get your sample in the mail to you ASAP!!!!!

I will be having a group on FB this next week through the party and would LOVE to have you be a part of it!!!!!

If you want to place an order NOW or see more about Jamberry, you can visit Brandy's site :-). If you decide to place an order, just make sure to choose "Maxwell Family's Jammin Adoption Fundraiser" at the checkout!!! Click HERE to place an order!!!!

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!

"Okay, God."

This past week, Nathan and I got busy about focusing on our next adoption. I have done more research, we have a plan, and we started a couple fundraisers to work toward our first financial goal. I asked for people to pray for us as we get started AND as we work hard to save the money we will need for expenses.

This past week, Nathan was given the option of working some overtime. He will be doing that this next week and any other time the opportunity is given him. God is providing through Nathan's overtime.

This morning I woke up with a cold. I stayed home from church because I'm not feeling well and thought it would be a good idea to get a little extra rest. This morning I received an email offering me another scoring job for the next week and a half!!!! God is providing through giving me some extra side work.

I am getting ready to start the training and qualifying process for this scoring offer, so it's not a sure thing right now. I have to qualify first. But we are looking at it as an opportunity that God has sent for us to be able to save a little extra for the adoption. Even if I don't qualify for the job, I still get paid for the training :-).

We are looking forward to seeing in what other ways God will provide!!!!! "Okay, God. Whatever You ask us to do, we will do."

Fundraising Time!!!

It's time to start fundraising for our next adoption!!!!

If you missed the announcement, please click HERE to see it!!!!

This new adoption journey is going to look very different than Maya K's adoption from Ethiopia. The process is completely different and we don't have specific amounts of money that we know we will need for different "steps" in the process. Additionally, we have less income coming in (since I am no longer teaching) to be able to set aside for the agency and legal fees. We are confident that God has led us to begin this journey, and we are confident that HE will provide the money we need at the exact moments we need it!!!!!

Our first financial "goal" is $3,430. We are planning to sign up with Christian Adoption Consultants, and this is the amount we will need to begin the process. This organization will help us throughout the domestic adoption process and we are very excited to use their services. We are praying that this will also allow for a quicker match with a birth mother who is looking for a family for her child. However, this also means that we need to be proactive about raising/saving the money we will need for expenses and legal fees.

Soda Cans
We did this fundraiser for our last adoption and while it was not the most "money-producing" fundraiser, it definitely had the most participation :-).

If you live in our area, we will gladly take all your soda cans and bottles and redeem them. The nickel we receive for each bottle/can will go straight towards our adoption expenses.

If you do not live in our area, but would like to participate, simply save and redeem your bottles/cans and send us the money you receive.

Puzzle
We also did this fundraiser for our last adoption. (To read about it from then, click HERE.)

We are looking for people to "sponsor" puzzle pieces for $10. When a person sponsors a piece, we will write his/her name on the back of the piece and add it to the puzzle. When the puzzle is completed, we will glue it together and frame it. Our child will be able to look at all the names on the back of the puzzle to see how many people prayed for and helped us bring him or her into our family!!!!

PLEASE be praying for us!!!!! We have a journey ahead of us that might be long or it might be short. We honestly have no idea how God is going to provide financially for this process, but we are trusting that He will do it as He deems best. We know that we will be stretched emotionally, financially, and physically, but we are looking forward to the end result!!!!!

Adoption Announcement!!!!

We are starting the process of a domestic adoption!!!!!!

This is a very different process from international adoption, so we are still learning as we go :-). Here are the details as we know them right now!!!

Decision ~ Nathan and I have been talking and praying about growing our family again for several months. In December, we tried to start the process, but God very firmly shut several doors that we attempted to open. So we stepped back, kept praying, and waited to see what God wanted us to do.

A couple weeks ago, several doors were thrown wide open and it seemed very clear to us that God wanted us to walk/run through those doors!!! Several pieces fell into place quickly and we are excited to see what God is going to do in this next chapter of our lives!!!!

Process ~ We are in the process of getting our home study done. The past week and a half we have been gathering the needed documents and our first visit with our social worker is this coming Saturday!!! Once the home study is done, we will have it (along with a profile of our family) on file in a few different places. The next phase is still a little "uncertain". We will be learning more about it in the next few weeks :-).

Request ~ We are pursuing an INFANT domestic adoption!!! Boy or girl. God's choice. :-)

Time ~ Honestly, we don't know. This could happen within two months!!! Or, we could be waiting for a year or more. We don't know. But God does. And HE will work out the details and timing in HIS perfect way!!! We have peace and confidence in that!!!!!

Prayer Requests ~ Peace. Patience. Finances. Details. Understanding. Wisdom.

One Year Home

It's crazy hard to believe that one year ago today we were arriving home with Maya K!!!! It has been an amazing year. A hard year. A memorable year. A year of beginnings. A year of changes. A year of adventure. A year of getting to know our little girl.

Here are some of her current favorite things (as I believe them to be).

Favorite Foods: hot dogs, brats, hamburgers, strawberries, corn, chicken, pizza (but doesn't like the sauce), black olives, pepperoni, beef jerky, ice cream, chocolate, yogurt with m&m's, BACON, rice & beans

Favorite TV: Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood, Wild Kratts, Clifford, Word Girl, Curious George

Favorite Books: The Three Billy Goats Gruff, The Three Little Pigs, Snow White

Favorite Colors: pink, white

Favorite Things to Do: run, color, cut with scissors, watch TV, play with her babies, jump on the trampoline, play on the Ipad at the library, library story time, read books

Things She Wants To Do: play in the snow again, camping, fishing

Dislikes: sauce, sitting still, sleeping, applesauce

Let's see how these compare with what SHE says are her favorite things!!!! (Keep in mind that she often answers questions with things that she can currently see. This is especially evident in the "favorite tv" section of this interview!!!)

"Meetcha Day" Video

On August 11, 2012, we met our daughter, Kisanet, for the very first time!!!!

"May I buy one baby? PLEASE?!?!"

Pam ~ Maya K and I spent about an hour at my sister Debbi's house this afternoon. My parents are coming to visit in about a week and we needed to talk about who was feeding them and what days. Debbi has twin 4-year-old boys and does part-time childcare for twin 5-month-old baby boys.

Debbi and I chatted about our food plans for next week while we each held a baby and Maya K played with her cousins Ben and Joseph. As Maya K and I were getting ready to leave, Maya K started playing with the babies.

When it was time to go, Maya K said goodbye to her Aunt Debbi and cousins, and then she said goodbye to the babies.

As she touched the foot of the baby her Aunt Debbi was holding, Maya K said "May I buy one baby? PLEASE?!?!"

My sister and I both did something of a double take and I said, "What did you ask, Maya K?"

"May we buy one baby, please??????? I want a baby, Mommy!!!!!"

Oh dear.

Debbi quickly told Maya K that these babies had a mommy that was at work and would be coming to take them home soon. Then Maya K and I left.

Here is a summary of our conversation in the car.

Maya K: "I want to buy a baby. Why can't we buy a baby?"

Me: "We can't just buy a baby, Honey. God sometimes puts a baby in a mommy's tummy, and God has not put a baby in your mommy's tummy. Or sometimes a mommy and daddy will adopt a baby or an older kid who need a mommy and daddy. That is what we did with you, Maya K. We adopted you because you needed a mommy and daddy."

Maya K: (sad voice) "But I really want a baby."

Me: "Daddy and I have already told you that we would like to adopt another kid sometime in a long, long time (we say it this way so that she doesn't think it will happen tomorrow!!!!), but you have to wait for a while. It takes a long time to adopt."

Maya K: "Will you adopt a baby, please???? A brown baby. Brown like me. PLEASE???!!!!"

Me: "Maybe it will be a baby. Or maybe it will be an older kid, like you were older. God will tell us when it is time and it will be very exciting."

Maya K: "Okay, Mommy. Maybe a baby!!!!!!"

Embassy FB Posts

Pam ~ I have utilized Facebook throughout our adoption journey to keep people updated and to record things that have been going on so that I don't forget. But not everyone who reads this blog are FB friends, so I thought it would be fun to share our FB posts from our Embassy trip!!!!

September 21, 2012 ~ We have arrived safely in D.C. and are checked into our hotel for the night. We head back to the airport first thing in the morning and fly to go get our GIRL!!!!

September 22, 2012 ~ It's breakfast time and then it's airport time and then it's sitting down for a very long time in a very small space with a lot of people I don't know and then it's time to go implement "Gotcha Day"!!!!

September 23, 2012 ~ Thank you to everyone who has been praying for us!!! We've made it safely to Ethiopia and are checked in at the guesthouse. We've got 1 hour here, then we'll meet other traveling families for lunch and then it's time to go GET OUR GIRL!!!!

We LOVE our little girl soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much!!!!!! I was hoping to get a video of us meeting her again, but she appeared out of nowhere and jumped into my arms with a HUGE smile on her face!!!!! Nathan and I are VERY tired, but hanging in there. She is FULL of energy (and didn't get a nap today so she is also tired and has NO attention span)!!!! Prayers for strength would be greatly appreciated!!!!

We put Maya K to bed EARLY tonight because she was sooooo tired. So we're praying that she doesn't wake up crazy early. I greased her skin up with baby oil) and some in her hair too), put her in footsie pajamas, brushed her teeth (YAY for her knowing how to do it already; I'm lovin' those nannies that have been taking care of her), "greased" up her face with cream, Nathan read a story to her and we put her in bed. It only took about 15-20 times of laying her back down with me laying down in the bed next to her crib (I know she's too old for a crib, but it's what we have available to us here), for her to finally fall asleep. Please pray that she sleeps the whole night through and doesn't wake up scared or confused!!!! (Sorry for the long post. There's been a lot happening!!!!)

September 24, 2012 ~ Kisanet slept for 12 hours last night and woke up smiling and laughing!!!! What a blessing to get to cuddle and snuggle with our little girl first thing in the morning!!! We will be leaving for our first lunch out with her in a few minutes, and we're praying that it will go well!!!.

She just called me "Enat"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That means "mommy" in Amharic!!!! Be still my heart!!!!!

We got through lunch (remind me to buy some large bibs when we get home; she is a VERY messy eater!!!) and came back to the guesthouse for a late nap (we ALL needed one). It took a half hour for her to settle down and go to sleep, but then she slept for an hour. We just woke her up (it's 4 p.m. here and we want her to sleep tonight) and she's cuddling with her daddy while eating a granola bar. We are soooooooooooooo thankful for the bonding that is already taking place!!!!! God is good!!!!!

September 25, 2012 ~ We need prayers for strength and energy today. Last night was rough. Kisanet screamed for THREE HOURS straight!!!! And she's got a powerful set of 5-year old lungs!!!! No amount of holding or rocking would make her stop. We are grateful that she allowed us to at least try to comfort her!!! She's running on about 6 and a half hours of sleep and Nathan and I are running on even less. She woke up happy and smiling (at 5:15 a.m.!!!!) but we are TIRED!!!! We leave to go shopping in about an hour, then we have lunch, and then we have our Embassy appointment.

We had our Embassy appointment and everything went as it was supposed to. We're not putting Kisanet down for a nap today because we are PRAYING that she will be so tired tonight that she will fall right asleep!!!! But, in the meantime, she is CRANKY!!! We are VERY thankful that there is a play room on the roof of the guesthouse and Kisanet is LOVING playing in there. Nathan and she just headed up there again and Mommy is having a little quiet time in the room!!! But I'm heading up soon to "relieve" Daddy!!!

September 26, 2012 ~ Yes, we gave in. She cried for 45 minutes in her bed last night and then we put her in our bed. She fell asleep in under 2 minutes and we moved her back to her crib where she slept for 9 hours!!!! It's probably the start of a bad habit, but we all NEEDED the sleep and are feeling much better today. We are also trying to take into account all the changes that are going on in her life right now. She needs to know that we will ALWAYS take care of her and when she is crying "Enat" and "Dada" we want to answer her!!!! We are going to the older child Transition Home today to try to get some video of Kisanet singing with the nannies and teachers. She LOVES to sing and is singing different songs ALL day!!! "The Itsy Bitsy Spider" is a favorite and after we sang "Jesus Loves Me" to her at bedtime last night, she sang another "Jesus" song to us in English. It was soooooooooooooooooooooo sweet!!!!!

Today was a little rough. I had a meltdown of emotions this afternoon and Nathan is such an AWESOME daddy!!!! He kept Kisanet occupied for an hour while I lay down on the bed (and believe me when I say that keeping her occupied for an hour is a VERY hard task). When I got up, I still couldn't stop crying and my sweet little girl climbed up on my lap and hugged me and fed me from her granola bar and tried to wipe my tears with her shirt!!!! That afternoon was GOOD!!!!! We are all changed for bed and just need to brush her teeth, have story time with daddy, sing some songs, and then it's bedtime!!!! We're starting her in bed with us tonight, so please pray that she settles in and goes to sleep QUICKLY!!!!!

September 27, 2012 ~ Kisanet fell asleep right away and was moved to her crib within 15 minutes of laying down and slept for 9 1/2 hours!!!! Daddy slept fantastic; Mommy is sleeping light and didn't get a ton of sleep but was able to rest. Kisanet didn't wake up as happy as before and was very serious and sober until finishing her breakfast. She ate a TON this morning, so she was obviously very hungry!!! We are taking a trip to a mountain and then a zoo this morning. Then daddy is going to try to occupy Kisanet while mommy packs for us to go HOME!!!!!

This will probably be my last post until we're HOME!!!! Nathan has taken Kisanet up to the play room on the roof of the guesthouse while I stay in the room to shower and pack. We have dinner in about two hours and then leave straight from dinner to head to the airport. There are 4 or 5 other families that have been here with us this week that are on the same flight to D.C. with us, so we will all have lots of moral support!!!! Please pray that Kisanet will be good on the plane. That she will allow herself to be buckled in, that she won't cry or be scared, that she will be entertained by the entertainment on the flight, and, most importantly, that she will SLEEP for several hours!!!! The flight is about 16-17 hours long and that is a very long time for a 5-year old (and for her mommy and daddy!!!!).

Pictures

Pam ~ If you're friends with me on FB, you've probably already seen these. But since I can't seem to find the time to sit down long enough to finish blogging about our court trip, I thought I could at least share a few photos. Enjoy!!!!

Our Attachment Plan

Attachment ~ "The formation by a child of significant and stable emotional connections with the significant people in its life. This process begins in early infancy as the child bonds with one or more primary caregivers. A failure by a child to establish these types of important connections before the age of about five years may result in the child experiencing difficulties with a wide variety of social relationships for significant periods of time in its life."

We are not perfect people. We will not be perfect parents. We know this.

But we also know that we are going to be prayerfully doing our best as God leads and directs us.

One of the things that we believe is needed when adopting a child is an attachment plan. An attachment plan is, very simply, a plan of how we intent to foster and promote our attachment to Maya K and Maya K's attachment to us.

This plan is unique to our family and is what we feel we need for OUR family!!! We are not "promoting" this as some new fabulous and perfect way of parenting. This is simply our plan for our family.

We have created this plan after doing much research via reading adoption books, talking to our social worker, reading adoption blogs, talking with families who have adopted, etc.

This plan will probably change!!!! But everyone needs a starting place, right?!?! So here is our starting place.

• We are planning to both stay home with Maya K for the first full week that she is home. Nathan is taking the week off from work and we will focus on getting to know our daughter in our home and to allow her to get to know us with out any outside distractions. If people bring us meals (which we will GREATLY appreciate!!!) we will not be inviting them into our house or asking Maya K to come to the door to meet them.
• Once Nathan goes back to work, we will be keeping our schedule VERY limited. Most evenings and weekends will be spent at home, trying to keep to a very normal routine. Maya K needs a fairly strict routine when she comes home to allow her to work through her emotions as she may be grieving the "loss" of the only life, country, and culture she has ever known. There will be so many new sights, smells, sounds, language, food, EVERYTHING, that the more "normal" and simple we keep things, the better she will be able to process and adjust.
• We are going to pay attention to what MAYA K needs during this time and will not rush this. If things are going well and she seems to be adjusting to us and to her new life, we will begin introducing her to other people and to take her to new places.
• When we start taking her to new places and she begin to meet new people, we are asking that people give her (and us) plenty of space. Don't crowd around us and overwhelm Maya K. We would LOVE to have you meet her, but we are going to be paying the most attention to how SHE is doing with all the attention in a new environment. Feel free to tell Maya K "Hi", that you are excited to meet her, or whatever you want to say, but don't try to hug her our touch her in any way.
• We are asking that our friends and family, during this transition period, have a "hands-off" policy when it comes to Maya K. Because she has had so many different care-givers, it is important that she learn that WE are her mommy and daddy and that WE meet her needs, no one else. This may seem to us like a normal thing for her to realize, but it is often a difficult concept for newly adopted children. Especially children who are older when they are adopted. This is sometimes called "indiscriminate affection." The child is basically not able to distinguish WHO they are supposed to be showing their affection to. Often it happens that whoever the adult is nearest to them at the time becomes their "new" mommy or daddy in their eyes. Because of this potential issue, we are asking that you do not hug her, tie her shoes, give her food or candy, personally give her any gifts or anything, pick her up, etc. If she is need of something and you are with her, tell her to come ask her mommy or daddy or come get us yourself. This might not even be necessary at the beginning because we intend to be with her almost all the time. This is a VERY serious potential issue and because we aren't going to take the time to delve into all of it here, please ask us if you have any questions. We want family and friends to hold to this "hands-off" policy for a while, possibly as long as six months or so. This will really be dependent on how Maya K is doing!!! We don't anticipate this being something that will ALWAYS be the case, but we are wanting to do everything we can early on to help Maya K. And, by the way, this does not include other children. Other children can interact and play with Maya K just like they would with any new friend!!! This "hands-off" policy is just for the high school and college students and adults.

We know that some or all of this might sound a little crazy and different to some of you, and yes, we are new parents :-). But we are also drawing from the experiences of other parents who have adopted. Even from others who have both biological children and adopted children and who have seen the differences that are needed in parenting your newly adopted child. Differences that will probably not always be there, but that need to be addressed in a unique way early on. Since we haven't done this before ourselves, we are praying that God will give us wisdom and direction as we seek to raise Maya K into a godly young woman.

If you have any questions, please feel free to ask us!!! We know that you will be respectful of our wishes and our plans even if you don't necessarily understand or agree. Please continue praying for us and for Maya K. This transition will be hard for all of us, but especially for Maya K!!!

Submitted to Embassy

Pam ~ Yesterday, we got an e-mail from the US Embassy in Ethiopia telling us . . . . . .

Congratulations! Your adoption case has been submitted to the U.S. Embassy in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. Your authorized agent, America World Adoption, submitted the case to us on September 5, 2012.

One more piece of the final puzzle has been put into place!!!! We're almost there!!!!!

We honestly were not expecting to be submitted quite this quickly. Our agency told us that we would be submitted 3-5 weeks from passing court and we can only be submitted on Wednesdays. So, our case was submitted the quickest that it possibly could!!!! Praise the Lord!!!!

We are now waiting for a second e-mail to come within the next 10 business days that will give us the next piece. There are three possibilities of what will happen. 1) The Embassy will ask to interview Maya K's birth dad, 2) They will tell us our case is "not clearly approvable" and it will be forwarded to the USCIS office in Nairobi, Kenya, or 3) We will be CLEARED to travel!!!!!

We are anticipating that #1 will be what happens with our case. They will probably request an interview with Maya K's birth dad and we will wait to hear when the interview will be. Then we will wait to hear the outcome. Then we will wait to hear if we are CLEARED to travel!!!!! (I'm glad we've already gotten so good at the waiting game!!!)

Whatever happens first, at some point in the next few weeks we should receive an e-mail telling us that our case has cleared the Embassy and we will get to request three interview dates. We will have to wait one day to hear what interview date we have been given, and then we will make our travel arrangements and fly back to Ethiopia to bring our little girl home!!!!!!

Right now, there is a small possibility that we could be traveling back to Ethiopia in just a couple week {squeal}!!!!! The great probability is that we will be traveling back the very beginning of October. Whenever God chooses, we will go!!!!!

There are still so many things that I want to get done around the house, so I'm trying to stay focused and get as much done now as I can!!!!! Once we are cleared to travel, my house won't get any more attention for a while!!!!!

Keep up the prayers!!!!!!

Traveling to Ethiopia

Pam ~ Thursday morning, August 9, 2012, we woke up at 2:45 a.m. and got ourselves ready to head to the airport. A friend had sacrificially volunteered to come pick us up at 4:15 a.m. ("Thanks, Will!!!") and we were surprisingly ready when he got there.

Nate ~ It was kind of funny actually. The night before, we had prepared ourselves to be up until crazy hours of the night, but then we were basically done by about 8 PM. Then, then the next morning we were ready with enough time that we were nervous that too much was being forgotten. In the end, we never felt like anything major was left at home so that was a blessing.

We checked our four bags in at the counter, but questioned the lady when the bags were tagged to go to Dulles Airport in Washington D.C. Our travel agent had said that the bags would be check through to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. When I asked, the lady said that because we were in D.C. for 24 hours, the bags would not be held for us and we would need to pick them up. That worried me. How were we supposed to pick up our four checked bags, along with our total of four carry-on bags and haul all of them on a shuttle bus to the hotel where we would be staying in D.C.??? In my head I said, "Simple, we won't." I had no idea what we would do, but I knew that taking the luggage and totes to the hotel was not much of an option to me. 

The first two flights went as scheduled. We flew from Des Moines to Chicago, then from Chicago to Washington D.C.

When we arrived in D.C., Nathan called our travel agent, Kari, and told her the issue we had with our bags. She was awesome!!!! To make a long story short, she told us to go to the Ethiopian Airlines baggage office, they sent us to a different baggage office, and a nice lady told us she would keep our bags for us and lock them in her office overnight. What a blessing!!!!!! Truly, this was a blessing but it also made me nervous. She didn't take our names down nothing. Just a promise that in the morning we would see her and she would recognize us. To say the least, my trust meter wasn't very high. 

Nathan called our hotel to ask about the shuttle van, we waited for just over a half hour for the shuttle to arrive, rode to the hotel, waited until our room was ready, walked to a convenience store to get some lunch (from Des Moines to the hotel - it was just after lunchtime), were lazy for the afternoon, ordered in a pizza, went to bed early, slept well, and got up early to eat breakfast at the hotel and head to the airport. As we post here now and in the following posts about our trip you are going to start seeing a trend towards pizza. In my defense, in Dulles, I had no idea that I would be so nervous and apprehensive that not much Ethiopian food was going to sit well. (They spice their food very heavily.) Anyway, just a note: look for pizza references!

We weren't sure exactly how long it was going to take us to find the office where we had left our luggage, pick up our luggage, and check the luggage to Addis, so we wanted to have plenty of time. And we did!!!! Crazy enough, she DID recognize us and gave us our luggage without any problems. Trust renewed and my stress levels decreased just a little bit.

It didn't take us long at all to get our luggage picked up and checked in at Ethiopian Air, and then we headed to our gate. We were there PLENTY early and were able to sit and wait. And stand up and wait. And use the restroom and wait. Lots of waiting!!!!! (and waiting and waiting and waiting....I'm not impatient about things as long as I don't have to wait!)

It was finally time to board the plane and we walked on, hoping that it would be easy to switch seats with someone so that we could sit together for the 13 1/2 hour flight. That worked out fine and we got as comfortable as we could for the long flight.

It WAS long!!!!! (LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG)

Neither Nathan or I were able to sleep (I rested a little bit), although we tried, and jumping seven hours ahead of D.C. time (eight hours ahead of Iowa time) really messed with our body clock. We arrived in Addis around 8 a.m. local time (midnight on our bodies), walked off the plane, stood in line to get our visas, went through immigration (I couldn't find the address of the guesthouse where we would be staying and I felt very flustered as I scrambled through my backpack trying to find it; needless to say, I will have that address in my pocket when we go back!!!!!), waited for our luggage to arrive on the carousel, exchanged USD for Ethiopian Birr, went through customs (which ended up being SUPER easy for us, praise the Lord!!!!) and looked for someone holding a sign that would tell us they were there to pick us up. (Love you, Yonas...but we didn't see you!)

As we were on the airplane in D.C. and getting ready to leave, I noticed a family get on and told Nathan that I "thought" I knew who they were. I had been e-mailing with someone from our adoption agency who had the same court date as us, and I thought that it might be them :-). Because I wasn't confident, and because I am often too "shy", I didn't say anything. But when we got off the plane and loaded onto the shuttle that took us from the plane to the airport in Addis, I made eye contact with her and she said "Are you Pam???" Silly me. We could have talked on the plane if I had just said something!!!!!

So, once we had our luggage and went through customs in Addis, we waited for the Haskins family to join us in waiting for our ride.

We had been told that sometimes the drivers are not allowed inside the airport, but then sometimes they are :-). If we didn't see anyone holding a sign that said "AWAA" we were to walk outside the airport, turn to our right, walk down a hill that would lead to the parking lot, and look for our driver there.

Our very white and out-of-place group drew lots of attention as we tried to find where we needed to go. A lady from an office that said "Tourism" asked us if we needed her to call someone for us :-).

Another long story made shorter ~ Nathan and our new friend, Dan Haskins, walked all around the parking lot looking for someone who was there for us. (By the way - The American-ness that was Dan and I was very clear here as we were CONSTANTLY asked if we needed a taxi. In fact, if someone heard us say no to someone else, they must have thought it was still an option because they would just ask us too.) Becky, their two children, and I stood around looking out of place. When Dan and Nathan came back, we decided that someone needed to go back to the airport and have the nice "tourism" lady call our agency. Dan headed towards the airport, and, just then, we saw an Ethiopian man coming our way with a sign that said AWAA :-). He had been there the entire time, but we had somehow missed him!!!!!! (Glad you found us, Yonas)

He introduced himself to us ~ Yonas. ("Hi, Yonas!!!!! We know you will be reading this!!!!!") Yonas became a very good friend during our six days in ET. He is AMAZING!!!!!!

And that is the end of our "Traveling to Ethiopia" adventure. It's on to "Day #1"

Maya Kisanet Joy Maxwell

We would like to introduce you to our daughter, 

Maya Kisanet Joy Maxwell.

We passed the Ethiopian court process on Tuesday, August 14th, and Maya K became legally our daughter!!!!

Praise the Lord for His goodness!!!!

Thoughts #1

When we get home, we are going to work on doing a post of each day that we are in Ethiopia. This is just a quick post on some of our thoughts up until this point.

Pam ~ I'm in Ethiopia. I've met my daughter. The little girl who has already changed my life. A strong-willed, affectionate, playful, FAST, sparkling, smart, beautiful child who has stolen my heart.

Our trip to get to ET was very long and tiring. We arrived in ET having just been in an airplane for 13 1/2 hours and not been able to sleep. We were able to get our stuff brought in to the guest house where we are staying and had about an hour and a half to "freshen up". Then it was time to meet the other adoptive families who are in country and go to lunch.

I wasn't hungry. I ordered a cup of tomato soup but was only able to eat a few bites. My stomach was in knots and I was soooooo nervous and tired. I kept waiting for that adrenalin to kick in.

We went from lunch straight to the transition home where we were the third of four families to meet our daughter.

Love. that. girl. to. pieces.

She came right to us and I tried to not cry as I scooped her into my arms for a hug. She was wearing the shirt we had sent her and had the photo book we made for her in her hands.

More to come on day #1.........

Today (day #2 in ET). Our daughter met the van as it pulled into the TH yard and grinned as she looked up at each window to see if she could find us. We grinned and waved and she was waiting by the door as we got out.

We had a fantastic afternoon together.

Then it was time to leave. We thought. But then we found out that we were taking "K" with us as we walked down the street to the older child transition home where "K" actually lives. Her face was VERY serious as Nathan carried her down the road and she wouldn't smile.

We got to see the room and bed where "K" sleeps and she started crying. And then I started crying. And then Nathan started crying.

I don't think I will ever fully be able to explain the look that was in my daughter's eyes as we took her into the home where she lives. The sadness, the fear, the panic, the PAIN. I'm starting to cry again as I type this. I took a picture of her face and it is NOT a face I EVER want to see on my daughter again.

Needless to say, leaving her was HARD. She clung to me and just sobbed. I was trying sooooooo hard to not cry, but as I set her down, told her that mommy loves her very much, and walked away (I didn't let myself look back) I lost it. The tears started and I don't know if I will really get them to stop or go away until I have my little girl in my arms FOREVER!!!!!!!

Nate ~ Well. I just read Pam's part and I'm crying again. When Pam says a long flight...she is under-stating what 13.5 hours on a plane really means. Those of you that have done it know, but there is a special mental pain that begins for people like me when we sit that long...and no. getting up to walk down a plane aisle full of people doesn't really help.

When we went to lunch, I ordered vegetable soup. However, I also had no appetite and only had a few more bites than Pam. I felt completely sick with nerves. What will we do? What will she do? What will she think? Will I ever be a good daddy to this little girl? Will we love her? Will she love us? Admittedly, I was terrified. In the end, it went well. She was hesitant at first but warmed up to us. She connected with both of us very quickly...OK. This is summary only. I have lots more to say about this day, but I'll wait until there is time to be thorough.

Today started with a service at IEC, the local Evangelical church that we attended. I won't say much here, but it was not like the services back home, but I could get used to it none-the-less! Today with the kids was much harder. Not just with "K" but with all the children. Yesterday, she cried when we left, but that seemed to be more because we were taking the things with us. Today, it was definitely because we were leaving. That was very hard and my heart broke for my daughter. I didn't want to leave her, but I knew that I had too.....Pam's has recapped that already and I'll talk more about it later. What also struck me today was how many wonderful children are here. For them to be at our agency's transition home, they either have a family that can't bring them home yet (waiting on paperwork) or they have not been referred out yet (most likely, waiting on paper work), or they are on the waiting child list. You can't imagine the smiles on these kids faces. They just want to be loved and cared for by a family. There is a longing in their eyes that I can't explain. The kids that would look at us while we played with "K"....and my heart broke again. It just hurts to see such a need and not be able to help them in some way....so I'm helping them, by asking you to pray for them. Pray for paperwork to move and God to move in the hearts and lives of the forever families that He has picked out for them.

We miss you guys....though we wouldn't leave without "K" if it was possible. We will be home in under a week and will try to get our thoughts completely down as soon as we can so we don't lose them. Thank you for praying and loving from a distance.

We Received A Court Date!!!

Pam ~ Yesterday, we received the phone call we have been waiting for the past few weeks!!!! Nathan and I have a court date scheduled in Ethiopia on Tuesday, August 14th. Praise the Lord!!!!

We have to arrive in Ethiopia no later than Saturday, August 11th, in order that we can spend time with our daughter before attending our court appointment, so we need to leave Des Moines on either the 9th or 10th. Our travel plans have just clicked into high gear. There is a lot to get done in just one week!!!!

I thought it might be helpful to explain a little about what we will be doing during this first trip to ET (at least, I'll try to explain as best as I know!!!)

The purpose of this trip is to meet our daughter and then to appear before an ET court judge, tell the judge that we have met our daughter and spent time with her, and that we do want to adopt her. The judge will then ask us some questions. There is a lot of paperwork that has to be completed by the time of our court date (a lot of it is paperwork that the ET government is responsible for and nothing that WE can help with) and if all that paperwork is ready and in order, then at the end of our meeting with the judge we will be told that we have passed and that "K" is now legally our daughter!!!! However, if ANY of the paperwork is missing, we will be told that we have not yet passed and "K"'s paperwork will need to be completed. This DOES happen, so we are already praying that God will see fit to have all the paperwork there on time!!!!

(Our court appointment will most likely be during the morning of the 14th. Because ET is eight hours ahead of us here in Iowa, please be praying as you go to bed on Monday night, the 13th, and/or if you wake up during the night.)

Regardless of whether we do or do not pass court on the 14th, we will not be able to bring "K" home with us :-(. Once we have passed court, paperwork has to be filed with the US Embassy and "K" will have to first be "submitted to Embassy" and then "clear Embassy" before we will be able to make our second trip to ET and bring her home. This second trip will be anywhere from 4-16 weeks after we pass court.

While we are in ET, we will be visiting some of the government-run orphanages, trying to see some of the cultural places in the capital city, doing a little shopping, making a long day trip to see the orphanage that "K" was originally brought to, meeting with "K"'s living birth parent, and spending as much time as we can with our daughter!!!! It will be a busy trip!!!!

Prayer Requests:
  * That travel arrangements will go smoothly and that we will get a good price on tickets. They are currently ranging from $2,000-$3,000 per ticket.
  * For peace of mind as I gather what we need to take and then pack it all
  * For the Ethiopian government and our adoption agency as they work on gathering the needed paperwork (it's a little hard to explain, but there are a couple of VERY important things that need to happen on August 7th, so please be praying on the 6th and 7th!!!!)
  * For Nathan and I as we prepare to meet our daughter and as we prepare to become parents!!!!

I hope that I have been able to explain all of this clearly!!!! Please feel free to comment and ask any questions you might have!!!! We are so very thankful for all of you readers who have been praying for us and encouraging us through our adoption journey!!!!

Fundraising Finale

Pam ~ We are still a couple thousand dollars short of what we are estimating that we will need for all of our travel expenses, so we still have a few fundraisers that you can participate in to help with our expenses. We are nearing the end of this long journey to our daughter!!!!

Pampered Chef ~ This is only an option until 9 p.m. (CST) tonight!!!! Go to www.PamperedChef.biz/DrucksKitchen and click on "shop online". Enter "Maxwell" for the first name and "Adoption" for the last name. We will receive 15% of your order to put toward our adoption travel expenses.

Soda Cans/Bottles ~ We are still accepting donations of your soda cans/bottles. We will recycle them and put the redemption money towards our travel expenses.

Photo Scanning ~ I will take your old photos and scan them onto a CD so that you have a digital copy of all your memories. Click HERE for more information.

Handmade Birthday Cards ~ We still have lots of special handmade birthday cards available for purchase. Click HERE for more information and for photos of the cards that are still available.

Just Love Coffee ~ We receive $5 for every bag of coffee purchased from our store. Click HERE to go to our Just Love Coffee store to buy some extra yummy coffee AND help us with our travel expenses!!!!

One Month "Referralversary"

Pam ~ It's been one month since we received our referral for our daughter "K" and one month since we first saw her beautiful face!!!! In some ways it seems like its been longer than a month, but in other ways the time has gone by quickly.

We are still waiting for our court date and we are still praying that we will be able to get a court date before the courts close on August 22nd (exactly four weeks from today). I got an e-mail from our adoption agency today that was VERY encouraging!!!!

"At this point, there is definitely still a chance you will get a court date before the closure. Your case is open and in line at court, and the court is still issuing dates.......Definitely still prepare for receiving a court date before the closure, as there is a good chance you will receive one."

I LOVED reading those words!!!!!

What are we doing to prepare to travel???  Well . . . . . . . 

Making a packing list

Finding luggage that we can borrow

Buying medicines we need to take

Praying

Finishing the required "older child adoption" training

Finding a pediatrician

Finishing the "Post Adoption Plan of Action" report

Praying

Working to empty out "K"'s bedroom

Keeping the house clean

Praying

Probably lots of other things that I am forgetting

It's a little hard to wrap my mind around the possibility that we could be in Ethiopia hugging our little girl in less than a month!!!!!!

Pampered Chef Party

Pam ~ Tomorrow I am hostessing a combined Pampered Chef / Premier Jewelry fundraising party!!!!

We are still about $3,000 short the amount we have estimated we will need to take our two trips to Ethiopia. The first trip will be to meet our little "K" and attend a court date, and the second trip will be when we get to bring our daughter HOME FOREVER!!!!!

This fundraiser is one more way that God could choose to provide some of that money. We know that GOD is the One who is providing for all of our needs throughout this long journey, so we know that He will provide in the way(s) that He chooses. But, a Pampered Chef / Premier Jewelry is FUN!!!!! So I'm excited to have a get together with friends and get to share not only my pictures of "K" but I also have a VIDEO to share now!!!!!! (So if you are in the area and want to see an ADORABLE video of my little girl, you'll have to come to the party!!!! Send me an e-mail or leave a comment if you are coming!!!!)

If you are not in the area OR simply are not able to come, you can still help us by placing a Pampered Chef order online (through Sunday).

Just go to http://www.pamperedchef.biz/DrucksKitchen, look up at the upper right corner of the page and click on "shop online", then enter in the first name "Maxwell" and the last name "Adoption" and your order will go toward my total "sales" for the party. And every order placed will help us bring our daughter home!!!!

There isn't a website for the Premier Jewelry, so if you want to place a jewelry order, you'll have to get a catalog and order form from me. But I have plenty of them, so just send me an e-mail or leave a comment and I'll get one to you (this will have to be local only).

Will you please join me in praying that God will bring in the last of the money that we need for our travel expenses?!?!?!

All Girly!!!!

Pam ~ As you can see, this blog has been made all GIRLY!!!! We don't yet know whether "K" will be a "girly-girl" or not, but it's going to stay this way for now :-).

I was able to go shopping with some of my teaching co-workers/friends this past weekend, and I "begged" Nathan on Saturday morning to be allowed to buy "just one thing!!!!" We can't purchase too much yet because we really don't know what size she is (although she looks tiny in our pictures) or what she is going to like. But I felt the need to be able to get SOMETHING in honor and excitement of seeing her face for the first time!!!!

Nathan was very happy to give me "permission" and here is what I chose. I ended up getting two things, because the necklace was cheap and really didn't even count :-)

It's funny, because I am really a PURPLE girl and don't normally gravitate towards things that are orange, but this hat and necklace just seemed perfect!!!

REFERRAL!!!!!

(Pam ~ Pink Font; Nate ~ Blue Font)


On Monday, June 25, 2012, I received the phone call that has changed our lives FOREVER!!!! We are going to be the Daddy and Mommy to a beautiful 5-year-old little girl from Ethiopia!!!! I still get this overwhelming feeling of awe and wonder and a silly grin on my face whenever I think about how perfect our daughter is :-). God is soooooooo good and we are so very blessed to be given this chance to be the parents of this special little girl!!!!!

Pam had an overwhelming feeling of awe and wonder; my feelings were much more confused. This was good because it was unexpected and we weren't dwelling on the waiting that we were going through. However, because of my job and the responsibilities that I had during the week that our call came through, I was forced to focus on my job when I was at work. That included from the moment I got the call until the end of Friday that week. Was I distracted at work? Absolutely! I didn't say I worked well, just that I had to try to focus. Because of this, my memories of the emotions are less clear in my mind than they are for Pam. I know that I felt an immediate rush, followed by an immediate thought of, "How am I going to focus on my job this week." At the same time, the excitement was there any time I wasn't at work and it was threatening to bubble over much of the time that I was at work. In fact, one day that week, I was having a very rough morning and afternoon. One of my co-workers came over to me, pointed to "K"'s picture and smiled. It was a wonderful moment. I just looked at our daughter and, while the stresses didn't disappear, they felt much lighter for that wonderful moment.

The Details
I was at home, sitting on the couch, watching the end of Dr. Phil (I don't watch him very often, but it just happened to be a day that I was). I glanced at the oven clock and saw that it was 3:55 p.m. and had the brief thought that our agency's office hours would be done in 5 minutes and went back to watching TV. At 3:58 p.m. my cell phone rang. I picked it up, glanced at the caller ID and saw "AWAA". I just stared at the phone in my hand as it rang!!!! When I finally realized that I needed to answer it, I heard the voice of our family coordinator greeting me and asking if Nate was with me.

(I won't recount the exact wording of our conversation, but I do want to write a lot of it here. I want to have these memories recorded, because although I feel right now as if I will NEVER forget these moments, I know that memories fade as time passes.)

I told Elise (our FC) that Nathan was still at work for another half hour. She then told me that she had some news for us and asked if our family "situation" was still the same (no changes in health, financial status, etc.). I told her about our decision to not have me sign a teaching contract for next school year and she asked what Nathan made. I told her I didn't know off the top of my head and she said that she would quickly check our file. Elise asked if I wanted her to try to conference call Nathan in and I said "YES" so she put me on hold while she went to check our file and call Nathan.

My heart was POUNDING and I had started to shake!!!! I was pretty sure that this was THE call, but I didn't want to be disappointed if she needed to tell us something else. I was on hold for about 5 minutes and that was a loooooooooooooooooooooooooong 5 minutes. I was praying that God would give me strength if this wasn't THE call and that I would not have any bitterness in me if there was something else happening.

Elise came back on the line and told me that she had been unable to reach Nathan. She asked if there was another number that she could try and I told her that there wasn't. I also told her that if Nathan saw a missed call on his phone and realized it was her that he would call her back. She said that she would "patch him in" if he did call back :-).

Then she told me that she had some news for us and asked if I wanted her to tell me or wait until later when she might be able to tell us together. Now I really appreciate her willingness to check and make sure, but REALLY????? Can you imagine me being able to WAIT to hear what the news was?!?! I told her that I didn't think Nathan would mind if she told me :-). I'm SO GLAD she didn't wait to hear the news. I would have minded if she HAD waited.

Then came these words.

"Well, this is your referral call."

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

(I didn't actually do that, but I wanted to!!!!!!)

Elise started telling me all sorts of information while I quickly tried to find a piece of paper and a pen to write down what she was telling me. I was having trouble holding the phone, holding the paper still, and gripping the pen to write, all while my hands were shaking. I pretty much didn't say ANYTHING to Elise (hopefully she knew that I was trying to listen but was a little bit in shock) and when she asked if I had any questions I told her that I was trying to write it all down but that I was so excited I didn't know how much I was getting. She told me that she would be sending an e-mail with more information, files, paperwork, and PICTURES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Telling Nathan
After I hung up with Elise, I immediately e-mailed Nathan ~ "Do you have a missed call?????? CALL ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!" at 4:10 p.m.

When I hadn't received an e-mail back OR a phone call (within 60 seconds!!!), I texted him ~ CALL ME!!!!!!!!!!!!! at 4:11 p.m.

(I was feeling a little impatient!!!!)

He called me at 4:12 p.m. and quietly said, "What's up???" I told him that our agency had called and asked him if he wanted me to tell him the news or if I should wait until he got off work in 15 minutes. I honestly don't remember much of that phone conversation. I was soooooooooooooooooooooo excited and kept staring at my computer screen watching for the e-mail that was going to show me the first pictures I would ever see of my DAUGHTER!!!!!! I do remember asking him if I could open the e-mail and see her pictures or if I should wait until he got home. (I knew that I should, and really wanted to, wait until he got home, but I just wanted to SEE HER!!!!!!) He asked me to wait and said that he had to get back to work but that he would call me as soon as he was in his car. I really wanted her to wait for me so that we could do this together.  I wanted so badly to see these pictures together; to share the moment of meeting our future daughter.

And here is what Nathan remembers from those moments.

Nathan's Memories
4:00ish. That is the time that my phone vibrated in my pocket; the first time. As I mentioned before, this was a very busy week for me at work. I had the extra responsibilities that I get about once every 6-7 weeks on a normal rotation basis and that require more focus and attention than my normal week. Due to that, I didn't even check to see who had called or texted me. Then, it vibrated again, and then, around 4:10, it vibrated a third time. Finally, I thought, "This better be important." I walked away from my desk, checked my phone and I had two text messages from a good friend of ours. As I looked at them to see what was going on, I got a text from Pam that said, "Did you get a call?  CALL ME!" As a clarification, I didn't see Pam's e-mail until later. At that point, I thought something was up, so I checked my missed calls...and I knew. I saw AWAA, I saw the "tone" of Pam's text message, and I knew. I went to a quiet room and called my wife to hear the wonderful news. What wonderful news!!!


It is hard to explain my emotions at this time. I'm a numbers guy. I'm hopeful and usually very upbeat, but deep down, I'm also a realist and a skeptic. Those things tempered my joy that day. I was VERY excited to get the referral, but I still wanted to pass court: to have an official "this can never be changed...EVER" relationship with our daughter. Remember, I was VERY excited, but still holding out as well.

Seeing HER!!!!
I'm pretty sure I squealed!!!! She is BEAUTIFUL!!!!! Her smile lit up my computer screen and we were giddy as we looked at our daughter's face for the first time!!!!

And then I cried. And cried. And then cried some more.

Nathan asked "These are good tears, right?!?!"

Yes, they were good tears. Some of the best tears I have ever cried.

She "squealed" and then REALLY cried. They were good tears, but yet it was hard for me. I knew it was good, but I don't like it when my wife cries...probably because I "know" that they were good tears and not tears of pain, but I still wonder and my protective instincts kick in.


Telling Family
We had a plan of how we wanted to tell our family once we had received our referral. We wanted to make sure we told our parents first and then we wanted to tell family that are in the area in person. We set our plan in motion and it went just as we had planned it :-).

Getting to see my parents' reaction via Skype was extra-special (along with my sister Kristi!!!!) Seeing my sister Debbi come down the stairs in her painting clothes, not having ANY idea why we were there, and then breaking into tears upon seeing "K"'s face and hugging me was one our sweetest moments together. I loved seeing Debbi and Pam's moment together. It was wonderful to see the love that they share. Pam doesn't know this yet (until she reads this) but my strongest memory of this day is the moment that Debbi knew it was THE call and Pam and Debbi had their crying hug. What an amazingly loving moment between sisters. :o) (I was grateful that Doug was there too as I really wanted to share the news with both of them...and I'm glad the boys were there even though they didn't fully understand what was going on: this is just my strongest memory.)

Trying to stay calm and not give anything away while calling Nathan's sister Heidi to ask her if we could "stop by" for a just a few minutes was hard :-). Getting to share "K"'s photo with Heidi and our nephew and nieces was very sweet as they all talked about how excited they are to meet their cousin. It was also fun to be able to drive to Des Moines and show my sister, Heidi, and her 4 kids. It was fun to hear the "Awwwwwwww"'s from the kids and to see Heidi's expressions of excitement too. It was also fun to hear their excitement at having a girl cousin.


Skype. If you are further from family than a half hour or hour drive, you should get the free version. Is it perfect with wonderful quality? No. However, it is free and an amazing tool for connecting over a long distance. We were able to Skype my brother in Delaware, my in-laws in Colorado and my parents (the next morning) in Colorado as well. It was cool to be able to hold up pictures and let them see their new granddaughter (or niece).


We spent most of the evening calling family and telling them our good news. Nathan kept trying to get me to eat something for dinner, but I was just too excited to even try to think about food!!!! (He did find something to eat for himself!!!) We had a couple really close friends that we wanted to call, and then we finally posted our good news on Facebook :-).

Around 10 p.m. I told Nathan and he should really start heading for bed (he had to get up for work the next day) but that there was absolutely NO WAY that I was going to be able to sleep, so I was going to stay up a while longer. We kept getting distracted, so around 11 p.m. I finally headed upstairs with Nathan to go to bed. I didn't get to sleep until after midnight and then I woke up at 5 a.m.wide awake and ready to shout to the world that I HAVE A DAUGHTER!!!!!!!

I really have no words to even begin to express how thankful I am for everyone who has been praying for us along our journey to this point!!!!  Your prayers have encouraged, supported, and uplifted us through some very hard and discouraging times, and I want to THANK each one of you!!!!!

I also want to thank everyone for their excitement and congratulations. This is a wonderful time for us and this has been a long hard road that God has led us down, but it has been a great blessing and encouragement to have so many friends and family supporting us on that journey. God has been good to us and that includes your support, love, and prayers. Thank you!!!