One Year DTE

(I'm a few days late on this post, but I didn't want to just "forget" it; so here it is.)

It's been one year since we were added to our agency's "list" of adopting families.  While we don't know our "place" on the official list that our adoption agency (America World) keeps, we have been following an unofficial list on the Yahoo group that we are a part of and we have been keeping everyone up-to-date each month as to where we are on that list.  The first few months we moved up several places.

One Month DTE

Two Months DTE

Three Months DTE

Four Months DTE

Five Months DTE

Six Months DTE

Seven Months DTE

Eight Months DTE

Nine Months DTE

Ten Months DTE

Eleven Months DTE

Here we are today.  Our request has changed.  WE have changed.  God has not changed.  He remains faithful.

We are now on seven different lists on our Yahoo DTE list.  We have seven different numbers.  I am NOT going to give you nice pretty pictures for where we are on each list :-).  Let's just do the three categories that we are highest on the list.

Siblings 0-10 years

Child 4-years and older

Boy 19-47 months

God's Plan Will Be Perfect

Nate ~ We recently asked you to pray for us that we would have wisdom about some decisions that we needed to make.  Well, we have made a decision and wanted to share it with everyone.  Pam will tell you a little more about how we came to this decision, but I thought I'd just share what we have done.  Our adoption process is more than a year and a half running and our dossier was sent to Ethiopia almost a year ago.  We recognize the importance of waiting; however, we had heard some rumors about the wait time for siblings and we wanted to check it out.  The answer we received was not encouraging.  Because of that, we asked God for wisdom, which He has promised to grant to us.  We are being led to open our adoption up to a single child, either gender, from age 0-5 years.  What does this mean?  It means that we could still receive a referral for two siblings (that door is not closed) but we could also receive a referral for one child.  The percentages suggest that we are much more likely to receive a referral for a single child than we are for siblings, but that doesn't mean it is a guarantee.

This was not a quick or easy decision for us.  We looked at the number of families looking to adopt siblings vs. a single older child and we recognized that we will not be leaving two children without a family even if we do receive a referral for a single child.  Again, Pam has more information and specifics now, but this is the change that has been made to our adoption request.  We are still confident that God will place the child(ren) in our home that He has been planning all along.

Pam ~ Isn't it great to know that God is in control of EVERYTHING?!?!  Without that knowledge, I think I would be a disaster right now.  This decision has not been easy for us, because our hearts have been planning and loving TWO children for over a year now.  But, in other ways, it has been an easy decision to put everything into the hands of our loving and caring Heavenly Father who knows what is BEST for us!!!

We had initially made the decision to request two siblings because we wanted to have more than one child in our home (and it makes more "sense" financially to adopt two at the same time) and because we wanted to be able to help biological siblings stay together.  We have stuck to that decision over the past year that we have been on the waiting list.

On December 6th, I spoke over the phone with our family coordinator and she advised me that if we continued to wait for young siblings (0-5 years) we needed to expect a much longer wait than we have already had (upwards of a year or more).  That was VERY discouraging to hear!!!!  She did acknowledge that God is "in charge" of all this and we could still receive a referral for siblings soon, but that it did not look humanly very likely.  She then encouraged us to consider being open to adopting just one child.

Nathan and I have talked and prayed a lot over this decision in the past couple weeks.  We do not have access to the official waiting list that our agency has, but we looked at the unofficial list on the Yahoo group that we are a part of.  There is a need for families to adopt older children.  

There are a total of 40 families on the waiting list that are requesting or open to young siblings (0-4 years).  We are number 10 on that list.  In contrast, there are 14 families that are requesting or open to adopting one child who is over the age of 4 years.  We would be number 2 on that list (and number 1 for a boy over 4 years).

We want children.  We also want to be used by God to give a loving home to a child who needs a family.  The need for families for older Ethiopian children is great.  Is God wanting that for us?  Is HIS plan different from OUR plan?  Maybe.

As Nathan said, we have now opened up our official request to be open to adopting one child, either gender, 0-5 years.  Humanly speaking, that is what will probably happen.  We will probably receive a referral for one child who is 4 or 5 years old.  God speaking, His plan will be perfect.

Here are our new numbers.  #20 (boy 0-18 months), #27 (girl 0-18 months), #10 (siblings 0-4 years), #1 (siblings 0-10 years), #4 (boy 19-47 months), #9 (girl 19-47 months), and #2 (child 4+ years).

Stay tuned to see what GOD does!!!!!

Arrogant Christians

 Nate ~     Please bear with the way I write. I write like I think - and that is often confusing.

By the year 2008, I had made two different professions of faith in Christ, neither of which were genuine decisions based on faith in Christ. I could add to that, but it is not the focus of this blog post. It was not until 2008 that I realized that I didn’t know what I believed. I didn’t know how to know. I believed there was a God, but I didn’t think I (or anyone else) could prove who that God was. To attempt to shorten this, I went through a time where I met with my pastor to seek counsel and I talked with my wife. They both encouraged me to keep asking questions and looking for answers. They gave me their thoughts and support, but ultimately, nothing they said convinced me. Which is good because now the answers are mine and no one else’s. I was ready to leave the church and my wife in 2008 because I was so frustrated with my doubts and the hypocrisy that I saw in churches. I now look back and see that I hated my own hypocrisy and so I assumed others were being hypocrites too.

One thing I understood was that Christianity hinged on the Bible, the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Either it was true (and Christianity was true) or it was not and none of it was true. I knew the facts. I knew the data. I spent months consciously wrestling with all of these details and my own doubts. I then came to a conclusion in August of 2008. I prayed and I told God I was going to trust Him and we would see how things turned out. It turns out, that’s all it takes - a faith in Jesus Christ. That faith has changed my life and who I am. It has given me freedom to be more than I would be on my own, as I have the Holy Spirit helping me in life and a Father I can pray to at any time for help.

 One of my problems during this time was understanding why Christians felt so sure they were right. I mean, what arrogance to assume that their religion was correct and everyone else’s was wrong. Who were they to make that determining factor? The irony is that in hindsight I can see that everyone does this. The Christian, Muslim, Mormon, Buddhist, even the atheist and agnostic assume that they are correct and everyone else is not. In fact, the person who assumes all religions are true is just as arrogant in assuming something that most of the religions of the world contradict. Today I was thinking, is it really arrogance? For example: If you lived in a city that had 100 wells and everyone drank from the wells every day. However, one day you discovered that 99 of the wells were poisoned but it was such a subtle poison that those drinking didn’t know they were being poisoned. If you discovered (or were told) which of the wells was the only clean, non-poisoned well, would it be arrogance for you to tell people or just your responsibility?

 In truth, the true arrogance that we show is that we know the truth and we do not share it. Is it arrogance to tell everyone that their well is poisoned but you know which one isn’t, or is it a greater arrogance to simply not tell them at all? Except, it is not their body that is dying, it is their soul. The Bible is clear that once the power of the Holy Spirit came upon believers (which it has) they were to be witnesses of Christ. They were to preach to the entire creation what Jesus Christ had done. That is, that Christ, being God himself, was willing to be humbled. He became a child, lived a perfect life so that he could die and that innocent death would cover the sin of the world. This satisfies a just judge who required payment to account for our sin. This satisfaction of justice allows Him to give us mercy where we do not deserve it and to see us as he sees his Son: without sin. That is our gospel message. That is the well with pure water. That is the one well that won’t leave a person poisoned and dying.

 Are we hearers of the gospel message only, or do we do something about it as well?

Prayer for Wisdom

Pam ~ Would you please pray for us?  That God would grant to us HIS wisdom.  That we wouldn't let what WE want get in the way of what HE wants for us.

James 1:5 says......

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God,

who gives generously to all without reproach,

and it will be given him.